I personally love the concept of V-Day because it gives us cause to reflect upon one of this culture’s most insidious and harmful illnesses; that is, violence against women. Right now we are in the midst of an economic tragedy, and in the dialogue about unemployment and financial security we cannot forget to recognize the many other intersections of oppression that are related to poverty. The rise in abuse against women (and, granted, not just women) as you go down the socio-economical ladder is well documented 1 2 3.
As a disempowered consumer and voter, there is frighteningly little I can do to combat this violence as an individual. As always, what we need is organizing and mobilizing. But what means we have available to us, absent the mass movement, are means we have an absolute responsibility to embrace. As a male my potential participation as an ally to women might be limited, but I can make a personal start. I hope that any men reading this also take this small start with me.
This is the pledge from the remarkable White Ribbon Campaign:
"From this day forward, I promise never to commit, condone or remain silent about
violence against women, sexual assault and domestic violence."
This is a pledge I have made today. Do not take this lightly, gentlemen. If you are anything like me, then addressing the offensive and potentially violent comments and jokes made by your friends is an extremely hard thing to consistently do. But as men, we have an obligation and the social capital to make this a perfunctory activity, and one that certainly has the social consequences to make it worthwhile. How many people might hear you question the merit of a joke about raping or hitting women and walk away realizing that such behavior is not sanctioned by the great, artificial gender divide, and that other men do not endorse it? How many people might no longer be able to hide to themselves the abuse they are themselves committing or condoning? How many of them may find themselves also actively seeking to facilitate a more considerate discourse about women in male-centric settings? Speak out, and do so in solidarity with other men who feel the same way you do.
And while you’re there, check out the White Ribbon Campaign’s website. In my search to make a contribution to the women’s rights movement yesterday, my lady friend @Apeywoo (of course) led me to it and they deserve a plug from someone far better than me.
Happy lovemaking (in more than one way)!
Thank you ladies. We will try to be better, and sorry for needing your help.
EXTRA: Just further proof that oppressors are happy to do so in several ways...
